I’m alive, I swear. I know I know, the blog is basically dead, BUT HAVE NO FEAR. I’m back! (How many times can I come back before I actually let the blog die, who knows?) 😀
OH WOE IS ME.
Well Cyndi, why are you in woe? THANKS FOR ASKING!
I’m all alone this weekend! -dramatic gasp-
Yup, that’s right. Everyone went home this weekend for easter, leaving me to fend for myself in the lonely suite and the shoe department at the store that I shall not name, but you all know the monstrosity of the retail store I work at. -cries-
Yes so I am all alone this entire weekend, it’s a long weekend too -shifts eyes- which is both a blessing and not. On the bright side, I can get a lot of things done and I can do a lot of solitary things that makes my introverted self super happy because now I can binge everything, write all the fan fiction I want, stay up to whatever time, and etc. BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, I’M ALL ALONE and as an only child being alone my entire life is enough. I cry I cry. -dramatically faints-
Just kidding. I think I’ll be fine, as long as I don’t think about it. As the semester is slowly approaching the end, I’m starting to think I have to get used to be alone again. Because once I start commuting next year to classes, it’ll just be me, myself, and I again. I should try and make friends, but that’s so difficult when you live with your aunt at home. So I’ll just stick to myself and see what I can do with what I have. Maybe reconnect with old friends who also are commuting. Who knows? IT’S JUST SO SAD. I’m going to miss having the daily laughs, and sharing moments together that don’t seem to really matter (like over bingeing SVU or shark tank) but really it’ll be nostalgic watching shows like that now. I’m not a person who enjoys over sentimental feelings, so it’s very conflicting, but a whole year of losing the college campus feeling I’ve grown accustomed to and have appreciated is really tough to swallow.
Especially when my family and I don’t have the best relationship.
But I can’t do anything to change that, so I’m trying to get over it. THIS TOO SHALL PASS.
On the bright side, I have a whole year to rebuild my finances and refocus my energy into my future career. I’ve decided what I wanted to do! I want to be a talent agent, or work for a talent agency in some form. I think the presentation I forced myself to go to the other week was really beneficial. I learned a lot about the industry I wanted to get into, and there’s nothing more I wanted to do.
Like the man said, “It’s hard to get into, but essentially working in this business you are responsible for making people’s dreams come true.” Isn’t that crazy? Making someones dreams come true, being able to carry out things to help someone’s vision, someone’s life goals. IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY JUST THINKING ABOUT IT. It’s going to be tough road ahead of me, trying to get into an industry like that but it’s going to happen. I just need to focus on the big pictures, and be content with small victories.
And with that big picture, it helps me focus on the positive. Because despite how shitty I might feel now, living through my finals and being so miserable at my job, I know that it’s only in the present. That I won’t be at this job forever, and I definitely won’t be thinking back one day about the final that I barely passed. I’ll be happily living in that dream apartment with my bulldog, and maybe a roommate, being able to buy things without guilt, and just content with my life. I’m almost there. I just need to make sure I don’t let stupid things bring me down.
I feel like I rant about the same thing all the time, but it’s like a mini pep talk to myself. I guess. One day I’ll read this and be like, wow, I needed to hear that.
I’ve been bingeing again lately, which is really bad for my eyes. I think my vision got worse, it’s like blurrier these days, I’m unsure if it’s the bingeing or I just need new glasses or I’m just tired. Probably a combination of all of the things listed, but NO REGRETS.
I binged Pokemon XY & XYZ, thanks to Netflix and Kiss Anime. It was amazing, I cried. I cry a lot while watching things if you haven’t noticed. But it was so cute.
I finished Naruto, finally, I’ll get to Boruto another day. BUT ONLY FOR MY OTP, I just need some moment of confirmation that they are in love with each other. Naruto and hint get a movie, and a canon anime scene. But the best I get is a moment of them sitting next to each other. SASUKE AND SAKURA DESERVE MORE THAN THIS. -cries-
Ahem -wipes gross tears- I binged SVU with my roommate (SAMANTHA WHO LEFT ME CURRAN -cough- what?) And we got through all the seasons on Netflix, I’m gonna put it on hold because there are obviously more episodes past that and I need to ready myself for the ongoing crime shows current season/episodes. SUCH A GOOD SHOW. Like it hurts, and really some things you wish you never seen but like it happens in real life and we should know it exists. AND THE CHARACTERS. I’m invested.
So anyways, now I’m bingeing Fairy Tail the anime. It’s been one of those things that I’m like why not watch it for white noise but now I am deeply invested in. OH MY GOD, so invested. I am in love with all the characters, the character development, the comedy, the drama, THE ARCS KILL ME EVERY SINGLE TIME. I have ships, which is a sign that I am obviously in way too deep. But for all off ya’ll that watch fairy tail. I SHIP GRAY AND LUCY, but really she can end up with anyone and he can end up with Juvia and I’ll still be happy. I JUST WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY. -sniffles-
After this blog post, I’m probably going to binge to odd hours again. To be honest without Sammi here, I have leeway to stay up later and disregard my health. -claps excitedly- I MISS HER THOUGH. I KNOW YOU’RE READING THIS AND IT’S SENTIMENTAL BUT IT’S TOO LATE.
Speaking of crying (well not really but sentimental leads to happy tears and that’s crying). TEAM BOYFRIEND. KPOP STAR 6. PARK HYUN JIN & KIM JONG SEOB. MY BOYS. -cries endless river- I’m so darn proud of them! At first I stopped watching, because Minju was obviously not going to win. And then she got eliminated and I WAS SO UPSET (tbh I still am, until she gets rightfully signed) but I also was rooting for Team Boyfriend. AND THEY WON. THEY ARE SO TALENTED, THEY ARE GOING TO GROW UP TO BE THE BEST IDOLS AND- (Wow lots of caps there).
Anyways, that’s all I have for my update. Anticipate a Kpop challenge, I have it in my drafts, and will get to it eventually. And also a “Destress With Me” post, because it’s finals and I’m always looking for ways to De-Stress.
UNTIL NEXT TIME! 😀
Good vibes all around, please send them my way! ❤